The Older, newly arranged. Brandon Joyce.

Winter Wonderland has asphyxiated our general nighttime activities, with its bitter winds blowing and layers of brown snow. But this will not stand for long. Nature cannot bully us forever. I proposed a solution, during a post-election party for the student paper- an exercise in pain dissociation. Tickling our thresholds. Willie and I boiled some lemon tea and paraded outside in our birthday suits to challenge Nature to a duel. After some quick and futile mental preparations, we laid down and stared skyward, as Annelies and Tyree buried us up to the neck in the snow. The mental preparations I mentioned before consisted of images of fluffy Ididerod huskies burying themselves under a blanket of snow against the sting of the arctic wind.
But…the reality fell remarkably short of my reasonings, I must say. In less than a minute on the rack, my body succumbed to wild epileptic convulsions, and an agony that hovered somewhere between sulphuric hellfire and liquid nitrogen. I tried dissociation, profuse swearing, and even Lamaze, but soon Willie and I leapt up howling and naked, as a few party-goers tried to make sense of the hysterics. Annelies retrieved my bathrobe, and lovingly ushered me back into the warmth of the house. It took me twenty minutes, lemon tea, and a hot shower to stop the violent shivers, but I was pleased with the shock therapy and spiritual renewal. Singed but centered because, really, I prefer such sensual overdoses to reawaken that immediate medium, the body. Getting to know my own metabolism. As for Nature, I demand a rematch.

Nature: 1
Fruitloops: 0

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